So after finally starting to feel better and working to get back on track with my meal plan, I have yet again been thrown another curveball by my treatment team. I trust them, but I hate these challenges. Because I have been sick, I lost enough weight for it to be considered a problem. While it is not my ticket to PHP, as I was not intentionally losing, it is an major roadblock in my recovery right now. My challenge is that I have to get back up to my goal weight. By doing this, I have to gain a pound a week until I reach that weight or I face being upcerted.
Now, even for normal people, I think hearing that you have to gain a certain amount each week would be terrifying. When you have an eating disorder, that fear is magnified by 10, probably more. My rational side says that that's not a lot of weight; however, translating that into my meal plan? That's a horrible feeling. Knowing that I have to increase my intake that much more? God help
So, challenge has been issued, and I have 2 choices: gain the weight or don't? It will always be a battle of mind over matter, but this might be the biggest challenge I have faced in this journey in recovery.
One pound a week at a time...
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